July 30, 1791
It is more evident than ever that there is something very wrong with this country when the monarchs themselves attempt to flee. Attempted unsuccessfully, that is. It was then I declared myself neither monarchist nor republican at the Jacobin Club. I could not fully vow myself, not at such a fragile state in time.
I see now that matters are getting quite tense indeed, and I must further throw myself into this political maelstrom if I would like anything to actually materialize. Bourgeois or not, I believe rights of man should extend to all men, from the sans-culottes to the slaves. I have accepted my role as a spokesperson for them (and as public prosecutor for Paris), as I am undaunted by anyone who disagrees with me, no matter their status! With the Jacobins and sans-culottes on my side, we can change everything, I know we can!
I am rather upset with what has happened recently. Foreign troops, marching in here thinking they can control us as they please – NO! I refuse! Why, just a mere week or so ago there was an entire massacre at the Champ de Mars! Almost 50 citizens with the sole desire of making a difference were shot at and murdered. If that’s the way things are going, I have no problem fighting back. I will do most anything to change this place and change the way we’ve been taught to live!
Yet, after the flee of King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette, things got better and worse. I couldn’t believe how cowardly the “monarchs” were acting, running away from their country when it gets too heated for their liking! A real leader stays and stands their ground, no matter what happens to happen. I haven’t a care for their petty reasons. If they had enough passion for this country and cared about more than their riches, running away would be absolutely out of the question. They’re rather out of excuses at this point.
My strong actions were attracting people of the democratic party, which is exactly what I wanted. The King and Queen do not deserve to be let off the hook, for their behaviour has been unacceptable. This cannot go on any longer. I demanded for a trial of the King, and this sat well with some people. Others… not so much. I gained many an enemy, and my own life was endangered. I thus went on to move closer to the Assembly and the Jacobins, as the people who I had to power to lead an influence were my biggest priority.
I am currently writing this in the home of Maurice Duplay, a cabinetmaker who admired what I stood for and kindly let me into his humble abode. He’s been keeping me safe, and I could not thank him more. His eldest daughter, Èlènore, is someone I quite fancy. If it wasn’t for all this pandemonium, I would certainly have her. I do not foresee my departure of this home in the near future. What I do see in the near future, however, is chaotic but revolutionary. I know things are finally beginning to take shape, but it’s up to me to ensure it takes the right shape – my shape. I have people by my side and that only reassures me that I may take on this role and lead with my heart, with my gut.
I know it will be alright, if I harbour the courage and leadership I’ve always seemed to have.